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In crisis – where to find help

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Yes ways of ending unhelpful calls is a good thing to plan for. It is one of the reasons that I struggle with telephones generally so it was inevitable that I am unlikely to find phoning any helpline as helpful as other people might. I used to find the Samaritans text service so helpful and was sad when it stopped due to lack of manpower.

Sunny Clouds:
What I struggle with in relation to ending calls, be it personal calls or calls to the Sams or calls to call centres, isn't what I'll call the preparatory winding up, but who says the final word(s).

I've had a long term problem with this.

I had a manager who got angry with me more than once.  She'd tell me to do something and I'd summarise what I was going to do before walking away (i.e. moving on, not storming off).  E.g. "Ok.  I'll tell the team we'll be holding the meeting on Tuesday, I'll arrange cover for the phones, and I'll make sure the documents are with the print room and ready in time."  She suddenly snapped one day and finally I realised what she was upset by.  She asked "Why do you always have to have the last word?"  I realised I was doing my army thing.  Superior + junior, final words are variants on "I'll get onto it right away, sir."  Not 'having the last word' but 'acknowledging the command'.

But there's that bit ending a call after one of you has said you're going to and you've agreed you're going to end the call. Who says the final goodbye?  I don't feel confident about it and have to keep telling myself that the majority of people, unlike that manager, don't care who says the final "Thanks for being there."  or "Talk again soon." or whatever.

As I type that, I realise the version I find easiest is when you're with a group of people and you leave.  "Bye!" you shout.  "Bye!" they chorus back.

Zoom meetings are the worst, there's a chunk of reality in this sketch

Sunny Clouds:
That is a wonderful video.  I shall be sharing it with a couple of others.  I've only been to zoom meetings with one group of people, once a week, with a few gaps, between autumn last year and spring this year.  It was obvious some people were more zoomified than others.

There's another ending I find difficult - emails.

I can cope with letters.  I was brought up with Dear Sir, yours faithfully; Dear Mr Bloggs, your sincerely; Dear Dad, love.

Now I've got to work out whether to say kind regards, regards, best wishes, best, best regards, love, much love...   or just my name with or without kisses. And how many kisses is ok? 

Ok, so maybe finishing a phone call isn't so hard after all!


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